Transformers 2 Longer Than Necessary

147 minutes. That's the run time for Michael Bay's next action explosion, Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen. Too long if you ask me.

I've stated on this blog before in previous Transformers 2 posts that I feel the original film is overrated. It's not overrated critically (it's only at 57% on Rotten Tomatoes), but fans ate that flick up like it was a last meal.

One of my big problems with that movie was that it was too long and the sequel actually eclipses that by a few minutes. Yippee.

I'm pretty sure that this might be the downfall of the movie business as we know it. If this movie does well (and assuming it's like most of Michael Bay's movies), we will be telling Hollywood that all we care about are explosions, gunfights and non-existent storylines. The time of simple, thought provoking movies that build their characters through meaningful dialogue and interaction will be all but forgotten. God help us all.

Transformers 2: The Revenge of the Way Too Long of a Movie hits theaters on June 24th.

Family Guy in Live Action

Adam Corolla has a podcast. Interesting. Seth McFarlane, creator of the hit show Family Guy, was recently chatting with Corolla and mentioned a Family Guy movie. Very interesting. And he said parts of it might be live action? What!?!

It seems that a Family Guy film is indeed on the way (although they already released a straight to DVD film called Stewie Griffin: The Untold Story), which is easy to note considering that McFarlane said about the flick, "I can say with definitive assuredness that it will be out." But live action? Bad idea.

When asked about this by Corolla, McFarlane simply said, "Possibly, possibly. It will not be a 90-minute Family Guy episode." So the movie may or may not feature live action characters, although it certainly is up in the air.

In my opinion, the Family Guy program has gone significantly downhill since it was originally canceled after the third season. If they make a movie, it better be damn good, and making the characters live action will do the exact opposite. McFarlane needs to do something amazing before this franchise is run straight into the ground.

Michael Myers Unmasked

Now here's a heaping portion of blasphemy for you. Michael Myers, the man behind the knife in the Halloween flicks will apparently not be sporting his trademark mask for the majority of the film.

Shock Till You Drop was recently on the set of H2 and is reporting that Myers will be mask-less for the first three quarters of the movie. Here's what I want to know. Why?

Outside of the original movie (which is a masterpiece of the macabre), the Halloween franchise certainly isn't the best and the mask has helped pull the franchise through even the worst entries. Why in God's name would the director, Rob Zombie, do this? Was his bloodlust not quenched after he destroyed the franchise the first time? Why kick it when its down?

And apparently, when the mask is introduced near the end of the picture, it won't even be the usual iconic mask. It's going to be completely different.

I'm a fan of the franchise (the original is my favorite horror flick), but this is ridiculous. Consider me uninterested in this movie. Let's just pray Zombie changes his mind and has enough time to rectify this horrible, horrible mistake.

Here Come the Men in Black...Again

Apparently it's become cool in Hollywood to resurrect franchises that, for all intents and purposes, have been long dead. Rocky, Rambo, Indiana Jones, Ghostbusters, all have been brought back in the form of a sequel. Luckily, all of those are pretty good (sans Ghostbusters 3--only time will tell).

President of Sony, Rory Bruer, recently told an audience at ShoWest that Men in Black 3 is currently in development.

I loved the first movie, but I can't remember the second because I only saw it once when it originally came out. I suppose it must not have been very good.

Either way, I suspect that if the time and effort is put into the script and Tommy Lee Jones and Will Smith both return to reprise their roles, Men in Black 3 could turn out to be a jolly good time for all. Here's hoping.

Out with the Old, In with the New

After years of speculation and begging, it appears that Ghostbusters 3 is officially going to happen. Yes! Being a big fan of the franchise, I was elated to hear this news, but then my elation quickly deflated, and here's why.

According to Harold Ramis, the movie won't be focused around the original team. "We're going to be the sage mentors. There are going to be young Ghostbusters."

What? You're taking everything that worked so amazingly well in the original (and decently ok in the second) and abandoning it to "pass the torch" to a young, hip, new set of Ghostbusters? For shame.

The original script for the third flick is now being used for a Ghostbusters video game adaptation, and I'd be willing to bet that will be more interesting than the movie, which is depressing.

The new script is being written Lee Eisenberg and Gene Stupnitsky, who better exceed any expectations and deliver a masterpiece, or else my years of wanting a new flick will seem like a complete waste. Look for Ghostbusters 3 in 2010.

Bruno Bitch Slapped with an NC-17

Sacha Baron Cohen's upcoming film, Bruno, has been given an NC-17 by the MPAA, effectively limiting artistic creativity and banning the film from being released (most theaters do not screen NC-17 films). Besides, Cohen has a contract to deliver an R rated film for Universal, but what does this mean? It means cuts aplenty and an inevitable Unrated DVD release sometime in the future.

So what was the reason for the rating? According to Sharon Waxman over at The Wrap, Bruno appears to have anal sex with a man on camera and in another scene he sneaks naked into a hunter's tent, a non-actor who had no idea what was going on.

Gay anal sex and a naked seduction of a heterosexual redneck hunter? Sounds like a good time to me.

Cohen's last film, Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan was absolutely brilliant and is among my favorite comedies of all time. Here's hoping he can hit that same level with Bruno.

The Expendables Release Date

After a brief scare that Sylvester Stallone's star packed, testosterone fueled extravaganza of manliness, The Expendables, had lost some of its awesome due to rapper 50 Cent being cast (which was thankfully rectified through his replacement by Terry Crews), it looks as if the film is finally getting a release date.

So when can we expect this heavenly slice of kick ass? Lionsgate has set a release date for April 23, 2010.

That's a long time to wait for what could be a mind explosion of pure action. In the meantime, check out the poster for Sly Stallone's last crazy awesome action movie, Rambo. You're welcome.

The Three Stooges Resurrected

It's true. The Three Stooges are being brought back to life thanks to MGM and the Farrelly brothers, the comedic talent behind Dumb and Dumber and There's Something About Mary.

So who is set to star? Well, Jim Carrey (who is a perfect fit for this type of role) will play Curly, Sean Penn will play Larry and Benicio Del Toro will play Moe. Now, I can understand Sean Penn. That guy is immensely talented and can pull off nearly anything he does. Coming off of his award winning role in Milk, this would be an interesting departure and I can't wait to see how it shapes up.

But Benicio Del Toro? Really? When I think of the Three Stooges, the last person I think of is Del Toro. I don't want to undermine his talent, but methinks it would be wise to recast his role.

No release date is set as yet.

Transformers 3 Release Date

Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen hasn't even been released yet and Paramount is already giving the next installment a release date.

However, it seems that Paramount and the man behind the robots, Michael Bay, aren't communicating well. Paramount has slated the third flick to be released on July 1st, 2011. After this news, Bay said on his website that he agreed to a July 1st, 2012 release, not 2011. After all, he's probably going to need a break after the newest movie is released. Creating movies with all action and no coherent or interesting plot must be tiresome.

The original Transformers movie was extremely overrated by the public. I don't know a single guy between 13 and 30 that didn't enjoy this movie besides me. Michael Bay is a master at creating riveting action scenes (although most go on for way too long), but everything in between is usually garbage. Plus, if Pearl Harbor is any indication, he can't direct his actors either. Ben Affleck's performance in that movie is probably one of the worst I've seen this decade.

Regardless, the Transformers 2 trailer looks amazing, so here's hoping for the best. If it's as overrated as the original, my interest in this franchise will be dead.

Mission: Impossible 4 On the Way?

What do you do when the world hates your personality because you act like an idiot, jump on couches on national television and look like a complete dork? Apparently, you fall back on the only truly successful franchise you've ever been a part of.

Tom Cruise was recently on a popular Japanese television program named SMAP SMAP (what?) and mentioned that work had begun on a fourth installment in the Mission: Impossible franchise.

Personally, I love Tom Cruise. Yes, he's a total kook, but who cares? I'm a movie lover and as long as he keeps giving good performances, I could care less about his personal life. Granted, not all of his performances are good, like in the poor WWII film, Valkyrie, but I've enjoyed his body of work more than not. And this franchise is awesome. If this is true, we'll be swimming in Mission: Impossible 4 goodness before we know it.

It Remake on the Way

I'm a big fan of Stephen King. I don't read too many novels, but when I do, they are almost always written by him. The man knows how to write a story. Even the film adaptations of his stories are pretty good. Although some suck, (Dreamcatcher anyone?) some are very good, such as 1408, The Shining, or The Green Mile.

One adaptation I haven't seen is Stephen King's It, partly because it was a made for TV movie which I tend to avoid like the plague. The other reason being that I haven't read the book because it reaches upwards to more than 1,000 pages, which I simply don't have time to read.

Luckily, It will be getting the proper theatrical treatment thanks to Warner Bros., who is pushing forward for a release sometime in the future. Dave Kajganich, whose sole other writing credit is for The Invasion, is penning the script.

Here's hoping the film can bring back that fear of clowns I used to have when I was a child.

Fantastic Four Starting Over

JoBlo.com is reporting that Fox is planning on rebooting the Fantastic Four franchise after two critically loathed installments.

Despite the popularity of the source material and the big name stars in the films (Jessica Alba, Chris Evans), Fox feels the need to dump everything about the previous entries and start anew with a new cast, new director, new story, and pretty much everything else.

According to JoBlo, they hope to make it more in line with the recent successes of pictures like Iron Man and The Dark Knight.

Personally, I didn't think the first two movies were all that bad. They weren't great, but I enjoyed them on a very basic level. I don't really know how to feel about a reboot because I don't feel it is needed. However, the recent Incredible Hulk reboot was leaps and bounds above Ang Lee's Hulk atrocity, so who knows? Maybe a reboot could put some life into the franchise.

Marmaduke? Really?

You know, as a child, I used to pick up the paper every day to read the comic strips. I've always enjoyed the daily dose of quick humor you can get from a simple three panel cartoon. I read nearly every one on the page, except for one called Marmaduke. It was never funny or clever and I hated it with every ounce of my being. I mean, just look at that comic strip to the right. If you think that's funny, I feel sorry for you.

So why, do tell, is JoBlo reporting that Fox is developing a feature length film based off of the comic strip? Did we learn nothing from the Garfield films? Is this what we get for having one decent movie about a dog (Marley & Me), that we get subjected to stuff like this? Where will it end? I swear to God, these companies have no shame.

Apparently nothing is known yet about the project, like whether it will be animated or live action, but let's just hope this one dies before it ever gets off the ground.

Nightmare on Elm Street Release Date

Well, it looks like Platinum Dunes is pulling no punches when it comes to remaking classic horror franchises. After the successful Texas Chainsaw Massacre and Friday the 13th remakes, their next venture comes in the form of a badly scarred dead man with a disturbing fascination with children. Platinum Dunes has given the Nightmare on Elm Street remake a release date of April 6th, 2010.

With their record breaking Friday the 13th remake, it's no surprise that they want to get this next horror project off the ground quickly. In fact, production will begin next month, although little is known about the project at this point. Will it be a straight remake like The Omen or a reimagining like Halloween? Who will star as Freddy Krueger? Who will get diced up by him?

The only known fact is that Samuel Bayer, best known for shooting music videos (like this Nirvana classic), will direct the film. So like it or not, another classic film is being remade and will be upon us before you know it. Look for Nightmare on Elm Street next year.

Friday the 13th Part 2 (13?) On Its Way

Due to the overwhelming success of the new Friday the 13th picture, which broke the record for highest opening for a horror movie ever banking $42.2 million in only three days, it looks like we'll be getting another entry in the venerable franchise, with the sequel landing a tentative August 13, 2010 release date.

I guess the fact that it broke another record, this one not so impressive, by making the largest drop in numbers for a horror movie in its second week losing 81% of its audience is, at this point, a technicality. It made bank, more than what the film cost, so why not greenlight another one?

I personally dug the reboot, seeing as how I'm a huge Friday the 13th fan. There's just something about that lovable oaf, Jason, that just makes me happy and I'm pretty excited about the sequel.

The writers of the film, Damian Shannon and Mark Swift, are returning to pen the script to the sequel, which will probably follow something along these lines:

Teenagers head to Camp Crystal Lake.

They have sex.

They drink alcohol.

They smoke pot.

They get mutilated by Jason.

Credits.

Can't wait!

Total Recall Remake? Noooo!

Blasphemy, I say! I've become accustomed to the current onslaught of remakes pumped out by the officially-out-of-ideas think machine that used to be Hollywood. But this is pushing it too far.

Total Recall, the classic Arnold Schwarzenegger action flick is being remade, much to my disdain, although apparently the minds behind the project are going to take the story in a different direction while keeping the title, which is Hollywood code for "we're banking the success of this film on the title."

Total Recall is hands down one of the best action movies ever made, a true action classic that I've cherished ever sense I was a small child and saw that chick with three boobs. Why not just re-release it into theatres? I know tons of people who would love to see this masterpiece on the big screen, including myself.

I can deal with Asian horror remakes (although they should just release the Asian horror flick in the states if it's so good) and I can deal with remakes of films from way back in the day made simply to expose the film to a new crowd, such as House on Haunted Hill (although the original 1959 Vincent Price classic is infinitely better than the crappy 1999 remake). But why remake a film that was made less than 20 years ago, a film that still holds up today? What is our world coming to?

It's official. Hollywood's think tank has officially run dry. Shame on you Hollywood. Let's cross our fingers that this remake gets stuck in development hell and never reaches the light of day.

Ghostbusters 3 on the Horizon?

Could it be true? Are the movie gods kind enough to give us a Ghostbusters 3? Well, in a sense we are already getting a third entry in the franchise in the form of the upcoming Ghostbusters video game, but in movie form?

Personally, I wouldn't hold my breath, but Dan Aykroyd recently spoke a bit about what could or could not be an upcoming third entry in the ghost hunting comedy franchise. During an online chat promoting a new House of Blues, a question came up about a possible third Ghostbusters to which Aykroyd replied: "Script is commenced early summer. Hope to be in production by late fall 2009."

There have been rumblings of a Ghostbusters 3 for months, perhaps years now, but it's still way too early to tell if anything will take shape. A couple short sentences by Aykroyd mean nothing in the grand scheme of things and this news should be taken with a grain of salt.

Still, if there is any justice in the world, the ghost hunting quartet will be resurrected. It worked for Rambo and Indiana Jones. Why not Ghostbusters?

The Dark Knight Hits Milestone

It's official (as if it wasn't already). The Dark Knight is one of the most successful movies of all time, racking up over 1 billion dollars worldwide. Amazing, and it couldn't have gone to a better movie.

The Dark Knight is only the fourth movie to ever reach that mark, accompanying Titanic, The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King and Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest.

One question remains though? Did Warner Brothers cheat to get to the billion dollar mark? The film failed to reach that number during its initial run, so WB re-released it prior to the Oscars and it slowly crawled up to that milestone. It seems legit to me--money is money--but apparently, some people are calling it a cheat.

Regardless, it's a terrific movie (my number one movie of 2008 in fact--read my top 10 here) and it deserves all the credit it gets. Congratulations all around.

Complete Oscar Winners List

As you should know by now, the 81st annual Academy Awards aired last night and personally, I found it highly enjoyable and one of the best in years. Hugh Jackman was in top form and pulled off the trifecta of hosting, singing and dancing all in one fell swoop. Unsurprisingly, Slumdog Millionaire sweeped pretty much everything that it was nominated for and Heath Ledger won for Best Supporting Actor for his vicious and brilliant portrayal of the Joker in The Dark Knight. In case you missed it, I've put all of the awards down below, with the winner bold faced. Just for fun, I've underlined what my personal preference would have been if I had picked the Oscars (which I totally should). Ready? Go! (Note: I'm not italicizing movie titles for the sole purpose of simplicity--the bold and underlining is enough already.)

1) Best Picture

Slumdog Millionaire

Milk

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

The Reader

Frost/Nixon

2) Best Actor

Sean Penn-Milk

Mickey Rourke-The Wrestler

Frank Langella-Frost/Nixon

Brad Pitt-The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

Richard Jenkins-The Visitor

3) Best Actress

Meryl Streep-Doubt

Anne Hathaway-Rachel Getting Married

Kate Winslet-The Reader

Melissa Leo-Frozen River

Angelina Jolie-Changeling

4) Best Director

Danny Boyle-Slumdog Millionaire

David Fincher-The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

Stephen Daldry-The Reader

Ron Howard-Frost/Nixon

Gus Van Sant-Milk

5) Best Supporting Actor

Heath Ledger-The Dark Knight

Robert Downey, Jr.-Tropic Thunder

Philip Seymour Hoffman-Doubt

Josh Brolin-Milk

Michael Shannon-Revolutionary Road

6) Best Supporting Actress

Marisa Tomei-The Wrestler

Amy Adams-Doubt

Penelope Cruz-Vicky Cristina Barcelona

Taraji P. Henson-The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

Viola Davis-Doubt

7) Best Original Screenplay

Courtney Hunt-Frozen River

Dustin Lance Black-Milk

Martin McDonough-In Bruges

Mike Leigh-Happy Go Lucky

Andrew Stanton and Jim Reardon-Wall-E

8) Best Adapted Screenplay

Simon Beaufoy-Slumdog Millionaire

Eric Roth-The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

Peter Morgan-Frost/Nixon

John Patrick Shanley-Doubt

David Hare-The Reader

9) Best Art Direction

Changeling

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

The Dark Knight

The Duchess

Revolutionary Road

10) Best Cinematography

Changeling

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

The Dark Knight

The Reader

Slumdog Millionaire

11) Best Foreign Language Film

The Baader Meinhof Complex

The Class

Departures

Austria

Waltz With Bashir

12) Best Original Score

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

Defiance

Milk

Slumdog Millionaire

Wall-E

13) Best Animated Film

Wall-E

Kung Fu Panda

Bolt

14) Best Costume Design

Australia

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

The Duchess

Milk

Revolutionary Road

15) Best Visual Effects

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

Iron Man

The Dark Knight

16) Best Original Song

"Down to Earth"-Wall-E

"Jai Ho"-Slumdog Millionaire

"O Saya"-Slumdog Millionaire

17) Best Editing

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

The Dark Knight

Frost/Nixon

Milk

Slumdog Millionaire

18) Best Makeup

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

The Dark Knight

Hellboy II: The Golden Army

19) Best Sound Editing

The Dark Knight

Iron Man

Slumdog Millionaire

Wall-E

Wanted

20) Best Sound Mixing

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

The Dark Knight

Slumdog Millionaire

Wall-E

Wanted

21) Best Documentary Feature

The Betrayal

Encounters at the End of the World

Man on Wire

The Garden

Trouble the Water

22) Best Documentary Short

The Conscience of Nhem En

The Final Inch

Smile Pinki

The Witness-From the Balcony of Room 306

23) Best Animated Short

La Maison de Petits Cubes

Lavatory-Lovestory

Oktapodi

Presto

This Way Up

24) Best Live Action Short

Auf der Strecke (On the Line)

Manon on the Asphalt

New Boy

The Pig

Spielzeugland (Toyland)

Produce Uwe Boll's New Movie!

Do you enjoy garbage? Are you one of those few who don't look for quality in their movies, but rather two hours of endless, dull idiocy? Do you want to be a part of one of the worst directors in film history's movies? If so, now's your chance!

JoBlo.com is reporting that schlock king Uwe Boll, best known for his award winning (read: consistently terrible) films like Alone in the Dark and House of the Dead, is asking for your assistance to make his new film, titled Blackout. That's right, for the small price of only $50, you will be a co-producer on his latest cinematic catastrophe. However, the movie will not be made unless he can raise $18.5 million. So you literally hold his movie's life in your hands.

But what will you get in return you ask? A limited edition copy of the flick on DVD! Boo-yah! What more could you ask for (besides a film that is even moderately amusing)?

Of course, the question remains, what if you contribute money and the film is never made? Well, you'll get 40 bucks of it back. While you're free to do whatever you like with your money, I'm convinced Boll is pulling a fast one on all of us because he should know full well by now that nobody in their right mind is going to give him a penny to create another critical and commercial failure. He'll get to reap the benefits of keeping the extra 10 bucks from all of the suckers who fall for this while they themselves get screwed over. However, if you feel like wasting your money, head right on over here to contribute. Have fun with that.

The Expendables Shaping Up To Be All Kinds of Awesome

What could be my most anticipated movie ever due to excessive amounts of awesome is about to get a whole lot more awesome-er.

Latino Review is reporting that Danny Trejo (pictured right as a vampire in the terrific action/horror flick From Dusk Till Dawn) has now joined the cast of Sylvester Stallone's action flick, The Expendables, creating an action overload of epic proportions.

Other cast members include Sly himself, Jason Statham, Jet Li, Mickey Rourke, Dolph Lundgren, Forest Whitaker and even Arnold Schwarzenegger in a cameo role. My brain just overloaded thinking about how truly amazing this sure to be extremely violent and wonderful flick could be. Keep your fingers crossed.

Any Movie Is Better With A Predator

Warning: super cool news ahead!

Coming hot off the heels of the recent news that Seth Grahame-Smith's novel, Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, is going to be adapted to the big screen comes the news that another Pride and Prejudice spin-off is in the works titled...wait for it...Pride and Predator!

Assuming this is more than just a rumor run rampant, the film would presumably be a period piece following an epic battle between the loving couple, Mr. Darcy and Elizabeth Bennet, and a totally awesome, bad ass, Predator ripping them a new one.

Of course, Fox owns the right to the Predator franchise and I personally can't see them boogeying down with this bad boy, but my fingers are crossed nonetheless.

Seeing as how all of Jane Austen's novels are in the public domain, I can only imagine what kind of nonsense others will try to get made into a film now that two possibly amazing adaptations are supposedly in the works. Got an idea? Have at it. One thing's for sure. It won't be any worse than the two wretched Alien Vs. Predator flicks.

Stretch Armstrong Movie in the Works

There have been plenty of films based on toys: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Masters of the Universe, and a whole bunch of direct-to-DVD Barbie films. Well, thanks to the overwhelming success of Michael Bay's summer blockbuster, Transformers (and the upcoming sure-to-be-huge sequel), it looks like an endless barrage of movies based on toys may be on the horizon.

Accompanying the upcoming G.I. Joe flick is a Universal live-action film based on Stretch Armstrong. Seriously. Steve Oedekerk, of Bruce Almighty fame, is penning the script. The only question now is which appendages will be stretched because God knows this could be one interesting adult movie, if you know what I mean.

Halloween 2 Site Live

Considering that the reboot of Friday the 13th hits theaters in a couple of days, I suppose it's only appropriate that my first post be about a sequel to another popular horror franchise reboot. Of course, I'm talking about Halloween 2 (affectionately titled H2), which is set to hit theaters August 28, 2009. While Rob Zombie is busy pumping out every bit of casting news he can via his Myspace blog, it seems somebody has taken the time to create a website for the flick, although I probably could have made this one considering how barren it is. It features only the poster for the film (which you can check out on the right), but for all you rabid Halloween fans out there, this is probably wonderful news so have at it.

The cast for the picture includes Matt Bush, Dayton Callie, Richard Brake, Tyler Mane, Scout Taylor Compton, Chris Hardwicke, Jeff Daniel Phillips, Ezra Buzzington, Mark Christopher Lawrence, Daniel Roebuck, Danielle Harris, Howard Hesseman and Bill Fagerbakke (the man behind the voice of Patrick from Spongebob Squarepants -- strange casting indeed).

Believe it or not, filming hasn't even started yet and that August date is getting closer every day. They better get cracking. Cross your fingers H2 isn't as bad as the stinkpile Zombie's first effort turned out to be.